Knock, knock. Who’s there? Adore. Adore who? Adore you, mommy!
Motherhood is hard. Sure, it is one of the most rewarding positions we moms will ever have, but sometimes we just have to laugh so that we don’t cry. And as it just so happens, there are plenty of jokes and puns that are sure to make any mom smile!
In honor of Mother’s Day, we have rounded up a collection of 120 mom jokes that are sure to put a smile on your mother’s face. This list has you covered with kid-friendly knock, knock jokes, clever one-liners, tongue-in-cheek mom puns, and silly Q&A jokes that any mom will love. (Like these mom memes—they’re funny because they’re true!).
Take a gander at our list of 120 jokes about mom and pick out your favorite wisecracks to share with mom over brunch. There are plenty of jokes that the kids will be able to include in a hand-made Mother’s Day card and even some hilarious quips that would be perfect to use as a Mother's Day Instagram caption for a family photo in honor of Mom on her special day.
120 Funny Mom Jokes
1. "It’s spicy” is a universal mom code for “I don’t want to share.”
2. Son: “Mom, can I have $20?”
Mom: “Does it look like I am made of money?”
Son: “Well, isn't that what M-O-M stands for?”
3. What kind of flowers are best for Mother’s Day? Mums.
4. What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? Where’s Pop-corn?
5. What did the panda give his mommy? A bear hug.
6. Don’t wake up mom! There are at least seven species that eat their young. Your mom may be one of them.
7. Why is a computer so smart? Because it listens to its motherboard.
8. Why did they have to rush the mommy rattlesnake to the doctor? She bit her tongue!
9. Why did the mommy cat want to go bowling? She was an alleycat.
10. Why did the cookie cry? Because his mother was a wafer so long!
11. Why was it so hard for the pirate to call his mom? Because she left the phone off the hook.
12. What are the three quickest ways to spread a rumor? The internet, telephone, and telling your mom.
13. Why is Mother’s Day before Father’s Day? So the kids can spend all their Christmas money on mom.
14. What makes more noise than a child jumping on mommy’s bed? Two children jumping on mommy’s bed!
15. I asked a police recruit during an exam, “What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?”
He said, “Call for backup.”
16. What color flowers do mama cats like to get? Purrrrrrrple flowers.
17. Cleaning with kids in the house is like brushing your teeth with Oreos.
18. What do you call a short mom? A mini-mum.
19. I bought my mom a mug that says, “Happy Mother’s Day from the World’s Worst Son”.
I forgot to mail it but I think she knows.
20. What did the lazy boy say to his mom on Mother’s Day when she was about to do the dishes? “Relax mom… you can just do them in the morning.”
21. What sweets do astronaut moms like? Mars bars.
22. I don’t want to sleep like a baby. I want to sleep like my husband.
23. How do you keep little cows quiet, so their mommy can sleep late? Use the moooooote button.
24. There are two amounts of pasta moms are good at cooking:
Not enough and enough for 3,000 people.
Related: 100 Happy Mother’s Day Messages
25. Mom: “Look at that kid over there; he’s not misbehaving.”
Son: “Maybe he has good parents then!”
26. What did the mama tomato say to the baby tomato? Catch up!
27. Mommy: “Mommy will think about it!”
Narrator: “Mommy never thought about it. She knew it was ‘no’ all along and just wanted everyone to STFU.”
28. Knock, knock.
Howard you like breakfast in bed, Mommy?
29. What was Cleopatra’s favorite day of the year? Mummy’s day.
30. Silence is golden. Unless you have kids, then silence is suspicious.
31. Why did the baby strawberry cry? Because his mom was in a jam!
32. Licked a dark smear off my finger, and then thought, “Phew it’s chocolate.”
33. What did the mommy spider say to the Baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.
34. I hate when I’m waiting for mom to cook dinner, and then I remember I am the mom, and I have to cook dinner.
35. What did the mother broom say to the baby broom? It’s time to go to sweep!
36. Mom: The amazing ability to hear a sneeze through closed doors, in the middle of the night, three bedrooms away… While daddy snores next to you.
37. Never doubt a mother! She can carry a screaming toddler, two gallons of milk, talk on her cell phone, and still slap the snot out of you for looking at her crazy.
38. Boy: “My mom is having a new baby.”
Girl: “What’s wrong with the old one?”
39. Nothing is really lost… until mom can’t find it.
40. Whoever wrote the song “Easy Like Sunday Morning” did not have kids.
41. There is a legend that if you take a shower and scream “Mom” three times, a nice lady appears with the towel you forgot.
42. Knock, knock.
Omelet Mommy sleep in today.
43. Motherhood is fun and all, but have you ever had the house alone on a Saturday?
44. Please excuse the mess. My kids are making memories. Of me yelling at them. To clean up the mess.
45. At my age I’m no longer a snack; I’m a Happy Meal. I come with toys and kids.
Related: Bible Verses About Moms
46. My Mom told me I’d never amount to anything because I procrastinate too much.
I said, “Oh, yeah? Just you wait.”
47. A toddler can do more in one unsupervised minute than most people can do in a day.
48. Knock, knock.
Llama Llama, I love my mama!
49. When your mom’s voice is so loud, even your neighbors brush their teeth and get dressed.
50. Son: “Mom, what’s a weekend?”
Mom: “I don’t know, sweetheart, I haven’t had one since you were born.”
51. Baby snake: “Mommy, are we poisonous?”
Mommy snake: “Yes, son. Why?”
Baby snake: “I just bit my tongue!”
52. Yes, please get a new cup every time you need water — said no mom ever.
53. You know you’re a mom when you understand why Mama Bear’s porridge was too cold.
54. Knock, knock.
Yo mama who?
Yo mama who knows you didn’t throw out the garbage like I asked you to.
55. They say women speak 20,000 words a day. I have a daughter who gets that done by breakfast.
56. Knock, knock.
Justin time to say Happy Mother’s Day!
57. You know you’re a mom when picking up another human to smell their butt isn’t only normal, but necessary.
58. Mom’s recipe for iced coffee:
Forget you made coffee.
Put it in the microwave.
Forget you put it in the microwave.
Drink it cold.
59. Mother to son: “I’m warning you. If you fall out of that tree and break both your legs, don’t come running to me!”
60. My housekeeping style as a mom can best be described as “there appears to have been a struggle.”
61. Why was the house so neat on Mother’s Day? Because Mom spent all day Saturday cleaning it.
62. Knock, knock.
Ivana give you a kiss for Mother’s Day!
63. Why did the bean children give their mom a sweater? She was chili.
64. My nickname is Mom. But my full name is “Mom Mom Mom Mom Mom.”
65. Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
My mom’s jokes,
Are funnier than you.
66. How many moms does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, obviously, and she has to do it or else it won’t get done.
67. What kind of boat is barely staying afloat, yet somehow manages to function? The mother ship.
68. Kid: “What’s a man?”
Dad: “A man is someone who is responsible and cares for their family.”
Kid: “I hope one day I can be a man just like mom!”
69. Before having kids, every mom thinks she’ll be a super-chill mom.
That’s because, at that point, we had no idea they’d break all our stuff, make ridiculous demands, and take roughly 10 years to get out of the car.
70. Knock, knock.
Gladys Mother’s Day!
Related: Mother’s Day Gift Ideas
71. My kids asked me what it was like to be a mom.
So, I woke them up at 3 a.m. demanding to know where my lucky sock was.
72. She believed she could, and she almost did…
But then someone asked her repeatedly for a snack and she totally lost track of what she was doing.
73. What’s the fastest land mammal? A toddler who’s been asked what’s in their mouth.
74. Night Mom: “Tomorrow, I’m going to get up early before all of the kids, pack their lunches, go for a run, cook a healthy breakfast, and enjoy 20 minutes of silent ‘me time.'”
Morning Mom: “Hahahahahaha. Nice try.”
75. Motherhood: When changing from plaid flannel PJs into black yoga pants qualifies as “getting dressed.”
76. I love my kids. Not enough to flip the fish sticks halfway through cooking, but I love them.
77. Son: “Mom, stop making jokes. You’re not funny.”
Mom: “I made you, didn’t I?”
78. Knock, knock.
Bacon brownies for Mother’s Day.
79. Why don’t they have Mother’s Day sales? Because mothers are priceless.
80. What’s the difference between Superman and Mothers? Superman’s just a superhero now and then. Moms are superheroes all the time.
81. Everything you do is so mompoint.
82. What three words solve dad’s every problem? Ask your mother.
83. Mom, thanks for providing me with womb and board for all of these years!
84. Yoda best mom. Love you, I do.
85. I whale always love you, mom.
86. Why do Mothers have to have two visits to the optometrist? Because they also have eyes in the back of their head.
87. A mother’s sacrifice isn’t giving birth. It’s nine months without wine.
88. Why did mom get a plate of English muffins on Mother’s Day? Her family wanted her to feel like a queen!
Related: Virtual Ways To Celebrate Mother’s Day
89. Knock, knock.
Alec to give mommy Mother’s Day kisses
90. Parenting is buying a bounce house and swing set just so you can sit on the patio and drink wine in peace.
91. Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut up.
92. 1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes are your regular clothes.
93. What did the digital clock say to its mother? Look, Ma! No hands!
94. I’m going to donate these bags of clothes to Goodwill. But first, I’m going to drive around with them in my trunk for four months.
95. What do you call a mom who can’t draw? Tracy.
96. Happy Mother's Day, Mom. Thanks for puddin' up with me.
97. I would write a book about parenting, but it would just be filled with rants about doing everything myself. And cocktail recipes.
98. Knock, knock.
Al give you a hug for Mother’s Day!
99. You're a souper mom.
100. What kind of candy do moms love for Mother’s Day? Her-she’s Kisses.
101. Not to be cheesy, but you're a grate mom.
102. Motherhood is a constant battle between going to bed to catch up on some sleep or staying awake to finally get some alone time.
103. Why did the boy put the Mother’s Day cupcakes in the freezer? His sister told him to ice them.
104. Son: "Dad, do you know the difference between a pack of cookies and a pack of elephants?"
Son: "Then it’s a good thing Mom does the grocery shopping!"
105. There is no butter mom than you!
106. Why did the Mother’s Day gift arrive the day after Mother’s Day? It was chocoLATE.
107. Mom, I donut know what I'd do without you.
108. What did the hermit crabs do on Mother’s Day? They shellabrated their mommy.
109. Knock, knock.
Abby Mother’s Day!
110. Olive you, mom.
111. Where do baby Transformers come from? Opti-mom Prime.
112. What did the banana’s mommy get on Mother’s Day?
113. You mean a waffle lot to me, mom.
114. What was the mommy cat wearing to breakfast on Mother’s Day? She was still in her paw-jamas.
115. Sunday School Teacher: “Tell me, do you say prayers before eating?”
Student: “No, ma'am. I don't have to. My mom's a good cook.”
116. What kind of coffee was the alien mommy drinking on Mother’s Day? Starbucks.
117. What kind of flowers do yellow jacket mothers like for Mother’s Day? Bee-gonias.
118. Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days? Their kids have to play inside!
119. To the woman who rosé me right.
120. Why did the mother cross the road? To get some peace and quiet!
Next, check out…
100 Inspiring Quotes About Mom
Gifts For First-Time Moms
Mother’s Day Quotes For Single Moms
200 Jokes For Kids
What can I say to my mom to make her happy? ›
- “Thanks for loving me even when I was a pain. ...
- “You're the best mom ever. ...
- “You showed me how to be a good person by your example every day.” ...
- “I'll love you always, and you are in my heart every day.” ...
- “Thank you for providing for me and taking care of all of my needs.”
You can pick presents like a coffee mug, cushion, photo frame, etc. You can also bring in a cake or order Mother's Day special flowers online which will brighten up her day. In order to find some of the best mother's day gifts, you can do some research online and pick the one that your mom will like the most.What is the best word for mother? ›
- 01Amazing. An amazing person is one who always surprises you with how incredible they are as a human being. ...
- 02Accepting. A mother who is accepting will love her children no matter what. ...
- 03Beautiful. ...
- 04Brave. ...
- 05Caring. ...
- 06Compassionate. ...
- 07Cool. ...
informal. : a female parent : mother.How do I get my mom to cry happy tears? ›
- Write her a letter. Most moms, even those whose children are grown, feel unappreciated at times. ...
- Create a photo book. ...
- Take care of something she hates. ...
- Gather everyone together. ...
- Make it Mother's Week.
Short Message for Mother
Everything I am today is because of your encouragement, mom. Thank you for always being by my side, mom. Thank you for having more faith in my dreams than I do, mom. No one in the world can replace you in my life, mom.
- You hold such a special place in my heart. ...
- I'm so proud to be your [son/daughter/child/kid].
- Right from the start, you supported me in everything. ...
- Now that I'm grown, I don't just feel gratitude for you—I admire you.
- Raising me took a lot of patience. ...
- Mama, you sacrificed so I could rise.
- “My mother is a walking miracle.” — ...
- “A mother understands what a child does not say.” — ...
- “The world needs our mothers.” — ...
- “A mother's hug lasts long after she lets go.” — ...
- “There is nothing as sincere as a mother's kiss.” — ...
- “Life began with waking up and loving my mother's face.” —
- Wash your face first thing in the morning. Time spent: 1 minute. ...
- Wash your hair the night before. ...
- Blow dry the roots of your hair. ...
- Perfect the hair bun. ...
- Mascara, concealer, mascara. ...
- Wear clothes that fit. ...
- Wear clothes that are timeless.
- Write a short note of gratitude to give to a loved one. ...
- Treat a friend to a coffee and have a present conversation. ...
- Plan a surprise date with your loved one. ...
- Send a song to your loved one that is meaningful.
How do I impress his mom? ›
- Encourage the relationship between your boyfriend and his mother. ...
- Tell her you're here for a long time, not a good time. ...
- Always be respectful. ...
- Keep the relationship arguments behind closed doors. ...
- Talk to her like a person, not the mom. ...
- Be yourself, and don't be afraid of that.
"We are born of love; Love is our mother." "When you look into your mother's eyes, you know that is the purest love you can find on this earth." "A mother is she who can take the place of all others but whose place no one else can take." "Life doesn't come with a manual, it comes with a mother."What is the nickname for mother? ›
Mummy, momma, mum, mommy, and mother are some other words for mom.What is a real mother called? ›
the woman who gave birth to the child.
The Origins of Mother
The modern English “mother” comes from the Old English term modor. And “mom,” along with other of informal or shortened terms such as “mommy” and “ma,” are often traced to this root. Interestingly, though, these shorter words may be even older.
Dad is an informal word for father.What does o mean in mother? ›
M - Maker of man. O - Observer of action. T - Teacher of life. H - Healer in pain. E - Internal blessings.
Crying and fussing: what to expect
On average, babies cry and fuss for almost 2 hours a day, and around 1 in 10 babies cry for a lot longer than this. Crying usually reaches a peak at about 6 weeks of age and then gradually lessens to approximately an hour a day by 12 weeks of age.
When do real tears appear? Around 2 weeks old, your baby's lacrimal glands will begin increasing their production of tears, though you still may not notice much change. Sometime between 1 and 3 months of age is typically when babies actually start shedding more of the salty stuff when they cry, creating visible tears.Should I let my daughter cry? ›
In other words, most experts today agree that it's okay to let our kids cry. In fact, it's healthy and beneficial to let them do so within our caring presence. Crying is our body's way to release upset feelings.
How do I tell my mom my feelings? ›
- "I want to tell you something that's pretty personal. And I'm worried about how you'll react. ...
- "I need to talk to you. But I'm afraid I'll disappoint you."
- "I need to talk to you about something. But it's kind of embarrassing."
- "I have something to tell you.
But if you want to turn your mom's fear on its head, all you have to do is tell her all about your big plan and convince her she has nothing to worry about. Give her details about how safe it is and show her how you've already worked out all the details. Once she sees it isn't really risky, she'll probably say yes!How do you talk to a girl mom? ›
Talk about your interests, your hobbies, and the things that make you happy. Involve your girlfriend in the conversation. Talk about what the two of you enjoy doing together. It's important for you to come off as a positive person, because no one likes being around a grouch.What is my mom's mom to me? ›
The mother of your father or mother is your grandmother. Your mother's mother is your maternal grandmother and your father's mother is your paternal grandmother.How can we describe mom in a one word? ›
Some adjectives that describe a mother are loving, compassionate, endearing, kind, protective, strong, extraordinary, intuitive, caring and mindful.How do I say Happy to my mom? ›
- Happy birthday, mom! ...
- Happy birthday to the best mother in the universe!
- Wishing the sweetest woman in the world a happy birthday.
- Time to make some wishes, mom. ...
- Mothers are the best gift. ...
- I can't wait to celebrate your special day with you.
- “Always my mother; forever my friend.” – ...
- “Motherhood is the greatest thing and the hardest thing.” – Ricki Lake.
- “A mother's love endures through all.” – Washington Irving.
- “If I know what love is, it's because of you.” – ...
- “The natural state of motherhood is unselfishness.” – Jessica Lange.
“A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials heavy and sudden fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends desert us; when trouble thickens around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to ...What is mother's love? ›
By. is defined as a protective and possessive affection which a mother will typically display towards their child throughout their life. MOTHER LOVE: "Motherly love is considered a possessive affection where a mother will protect their offspring at all costs."How can I look like a cute girl? ›
You can be cute by being open and friendly with people, by being interested and curious in new things, and by dressing and behaving in certain ways. But even if you want to try to be cuter, it's still important that you be yourself, because people should like you for who you really are.
How do girls look cute? ›
Wear clothes that flatter your body shape, you feel comfortable in, and aren't too big or tight. Wear light and positive colors. Wear pastels like purple, pink, or a shade of blue. Anything soft and pretty will make you look cute.How do I look like a mommy? ›
- 1) Choose your athleisure. ...
- 2) Embrace all fifty shades of gray. ...
- 3) Let those tops flow. ...
- 4) Have a really good pair of legging capris. ...
- 5) Apply dry shampoo. ...
- 6) Simplify your accessories. ...
- 7) Have something on your head.
- I love the person you are.
- You are my favourite human being on the planet.
- You make me so happy.
- I'm so excited to experience life with you.
- You're everything to me.
- You are my treasure—the most precious thing in my life.
- You make my soul sing when you walk into the room.
- 1) Touch his arm. ...
- 2) Send him a random text message in the middle of the day. ...
- 3) Ask him a question about something he knows a lot about. ...
- 4) Give him a very specific compliment.
- Ask Them If They Want Help. ...
- Simply Be There for Them. ...
- Take On a Creative Project Together. ...
- Leave Your Friend a Handwritten Note. ...
- Swing the Blues Away. ...
- Go Get Some Ice Cream. ...
- Do Whatever They Want to Do. ...
- Volunteer Together.
Show your parents affection.
- Surprise them with a kiss goodnight.
- Give them a warm hug when they least expect it.
- Wrap your arm around your father. Hold your mother's hand as she's walking.
My mother takes care of everyone in the house. Every day my mother prepares tasty meals for my father and me. My mother scolds me often but later calmly corrects my mistakes. My mother is also very hardworking because she keeps the house in order and has to work in her office too.What is mother simple words? ›
A mother is the female parent of a child. A woman may be considered a mother by virtue of having given birth, by raising a child who may or may not be her biological offspring, or by supplying her ovum for fertilisation in the case of gestational surrogacy.What is one sentence of mother? ›
[M] [T] My father loves my mother. [M] [T] She looks like her mother. [M] [T] Mary is helping her mother. [M] [T] Mary looks like her mother.Is mama short for mother? ›
Momma is an informal word for mother. Momma is also commonly spelled mama. Less commonly, it can be spelled mamma. Momma is informal, and it's often used by young children, much like the word mommy.
What is a funny name for mother? ›
An amusing and funny nickname for mummies is a good pick for a cool and jovial mother. Some amusing and funny nicknames are: Alarm Clock. Angry Bird.What are British names for mom? ›
The British typically use 'mum', and the Americans, 'mom'. But why is there such a difference in spelling and pronunciation when both nations speak the same language?What is a dolphin mom? ›
The dolphin parent is ... authoritative in nature. Like the body of the dolphin, they are firm yet flexible. Dolphin parents have rules and expectations but also value creativity and independence. They are collaborative and use guiding and role modelling to raise their kids.What is an adopted child called? ›
Adoptee / Adopted Child
The term “adoptee” can refer to two different things: 1) an individual who joins a family by adoption or 2) an adult adopted as a child.
(12) Son or daughter The term “son or daughter” means a biological, adopted, or foster child, a stepchild, a legal ward, or a child of a person standing in loco parentis, who is— (A) under 18 years of age; or (B) 18 years of age or older and incapable of self-care because of a mental or physical disability.How can I get closer to my mom? ›
- Appreciate the role she's played. Acknowledge and appreciate your mom's role in your life and how she has helped you along the way. ...
- Show her gratitude. ...
- Let your mom continue to influence you. ...
- Let her be part of your family. ...
- Dedicate time to continue traditions with your mom.
- 1 Practice Extreme Sensitivity.
- 2 Tell Her She's an Awesome Mom. ...
- 3 Encourage Her to Flaunt and Distract. ...
- 4 Take Her Shopping. ...
- 5 Compliment Her Outfit. ...
- 6 Offer to Babysit. ...
- 7 Suggest Some Pampering. ...
- 8 Compliment Her Skin. ...
- Be responsible and help around the house as much as you can.
- Keep a good communication foundation.
- Respect parents' decisions.
- Show parents you care for them and respect them.
- Don't change who you are, be yourself.
- Keep up with your school work and get good grades when possible.
With an emotionally unreliable mother or one who is combative or hypercritical, the daughter learns that relationships are unstable and dangerous, and that trust is ephemeral and can't be relied on. Unloved daughters have trouble trusting in all relationships but especially friendship.What do moms want? ›
- A clean house (or a day off from cleaning/parenting responsibilities!)
- Alone time.
- OR on the flip side, time with loved ones.
- Something thoughtful or homemade from the kids.
- Some spending cash, or even “a break from bills”
How do you get your mom to kiss you? ›
Simply go to your mom and ask her for a kiss. She will happily place a kiss on your cheeks as a mother. Now the real question is : Do you want it as a mother - child relationship or something else. If it is out of mother's love keep it simple , give her a hug and ask for a kiss.How can I make my mom proud? ›
- Do Good on Mother's Day. We owe a lot to moms. ...
- Spend the day in service with Mom. Moms have given a lot of time to us, so why not make the most of a day with her and give back to the community together? ...
- Make the day of a mom near you. ...
- Form a mom-to-mom connection. ...
- Give back and inspire pride.
- First Do Something For Your Parents.
- Make Them Compare Your Request To Something Even Bigger.
- Convince Your Parents To Think Past The Sale.
- Remind Them Of The Limited Time They Have With You. ...
- Ask For Something Small First: Commitment And Consistency.
- Breakfast in Bed. Bring Mom breakfast in bed by preparing her favorite food and drink. ...
- Take Her on an Adventure. "Mom-nap" your mother and take her out for an adventure to a museum, an art gallery, a show, an outdoor garden... ...
- Say No to Your Mother. ...
- An "Ahhh" Moment. ...
- Tea Time. ...
- Gifts from the Heart.